What ingredients does it take to make you? →

Stannis’ cock is made of diamonds, sapphires, and honesty. With a dash of MONSTER TRUCKS.

There is truth is this

(Source: cottoncandyflufftier, via criminallyincompetent)

THIS IS AN ACTUAL REPRESENTATION OF MY LIFE!

(Source: omuraisuu, via buttflowers)

Behold, the Royal Cock!

Stanny, The Cock That Was Promised

I was convinced, in homage to the 12 days of R’hristmas, that I should post the picture of a cock with a Santa hat on.

Merry R’hristmas and happy holidays, y’all!

Your Underwear →

Stannis’ Cock wears purple thongs. Size: XS. His package is impressive.

Oh internet, you know me so well.

Melisandre just asked if she could post a picture of a cock with a Santa hat for the festivities.

Master is looking at her as if she lost her mind.

Davos’s face makes me thing that he’s imagining me with a Santa hat.

And Selyse is sewing a tiny hat in secret.

Graduating Hogwarts →

Stanny, Slytherin, graduated with very good grades and becomes an Auror.

Yes, I fuck the dark magic out of the Death Eaters.

deisegal asked: I just saw a picture of you being kissed by Davos. You are a very lucky cock.

OMR!
*hides back in pants*
*pokes head back out*
WHERE?!

So, if you put Stanny, The Royal Cock on the anagram maker you get this

TAKEN SCRATCHY LOONY

As a cock, I am deeply confused.

As the Royal Cock, I shouldn’t be bored, since I have a lot of people to play with me. But I just am.

All I do is wait around on master’s pants and wait for something good to happen.

I thought I’d have more things to do with a tumblr, but I guess that I wrong.